How to Help Children With Anxiety: A Guide for Parents and Educators
The number of students experiencing anxiety has grown dramatically in recent years due to a variety of factors, including constant access to social media, increasing academic pressures, and complex social dynamics.
Understanding Anxiety in Children
At its core, anxiety is fear of the unknown. Children with anxiety often ask themselves:
What is going to happen?
What will people say to me?
What do people think of me?
What if it can't do what I need to do?
What if I fail?
This level of fear and anxiety often trigger a "fight or flight" response that manifests as symptoms including restlessness, feeling "on edge," having difficulty concentrating, and irritability. In many cases, children respond with avoidance - skipping social gatherings, certain classes, or even school entirely. While avoidance may provide temporary relief, it often reinforces anxiety in the long-term.
Avoidance vs. Coping
It is a common misconception that removing a child from the anxiety-provoking situation will help them manage their anxiety. Fpr example, placing a student on home hospital instruction may seem helpful but often intensifies anxiety when the child eventually returns to school. Instead of promoting avoidance, the focus should be on helping the child develop strategies to face and cope with their fears.
Effective Strategies for Helping Children Overcome Anxiety
Assisting a child with anxiety can be done in a variety of ways, each of which is outlined below.
- Recognizing the Signs of Anxiety.
Help children understand that feeling anxious is normal. Teach them to identify when anxiety begins to surface.
For younger children, use "feelings" vocabulary, assign colors to different emotions, or encourage them to draw what anxiety feels like.
For older children, discuss physical sensations like butterflies in the stomach, muscle tension, or a racing heart.
Once the child can label and acknowledge their anxiety, guide them to identify the triggers that cause it.
- Measuring the Severity of Anxiety
Introduce a simple severity scale (e.g., 1-5 or 1-10) to help children gauge how anxious they feel. Visual tools such as severity charts or emojis can help younger children conceptualize their feelings. This step allows children to select appropriate coping strategies based on the intensity of their anxiety.
- Challenging Negative Thoughts
Gently question the likelihood of the child's fears coming true. Encourage children to differentiate between realistic concerns and exaggerated "worst-case" scenarios. Tools such as a Big Deal vs. Little Deal chart can help children assess the significance of their concerns.
- Problem-Solving Skills
Teach children to address anxiety-inducing situations through problem-solving. This will likely require some modeling at first, but help the child to think through what they can do to help reduce their anxiety or respond to a negative situation.
Help them prepare for upcoming events by creating checklists or researching what to expect.
Role-plan scenarios to practice responses to common challenges.
The ultimate goal is to assist the child in developing a method for problem solving various situations so that they can feel confident handling similar situations independently.
- Coping Strategies for Managing Anxiety
Anxiety is a natural part of life and the goal should be to teach children how to manage it effectively. Students can learn a number of coping strategies to assist them with managing their anxiety. These strategies may include:
Mindfulness Techniques: Encourage children to focus on present sensations, thoughts, and emotions.
Diaphragmatic Breathing: Teach slow, deep "belly breaths" to promote relaxation.
Progressive Relaxation: Guide children to tense and relax muscle groups systematically.
When is an Anxiety Assessment Needed?
An assessment can provide valuable insights into the severity and triggers of a child's anxiety, rule otu other conditions, and recommend appropriate interventions. At FAPE consulting, we specialize in psychoeducational and social-emotional assessments designed to help children manage anxiety and succeed academically. Contact us to schedule an anxiety assessment or to learn about our services.